November 14, 2018
Lisa Zeiderman, Managing Partner, Miller Zeiderman & Wiederkehr, LLP
Lisa and Kathleen delve into the myth that as a stay-at-home parent, you don’t have to worry about finances. Getting married can offer many benefits, including financial ones. It can also bring some devastating financial consequences. Couples who don’t talk about money before they get married might find themselves in a situation where they feel they are shouldering more of the financial burden than their partner. Having these hard conversations before getting married sets financial expectations from the beginning, helps build trust, and reduces financial conflict.
- Believe and understand marriage is a financial partnership. Once you understand your marriage is a financial partnership, each partner has the ability to negotiate a better outcome for themselves, if things start to fall apart. Negotiations can be done before or during marriage with pre- or post-nuptials. Honesty and understanding finances actually build a stronger relationship.
- Understand your finances and budget. If you are in the process of getting a divorce, it’s important to understand your finances. This includes expenses and all sources of income – salaries, child support, alimony, etc. Once you know this information, you will know what your expenses are and how much income you will need to meet those expenses.
- Identify all of your assets. Another important step in the divorce process is to identify your assets. This can be harder to do if you aren’t involved in financial decisions. Working with professionals can ease the difficulty in locating assets – both personal and business for either stay-at-home moms or dads to help them understand what their whole financial picture actually is.
Lisa Zeiderman, a Managing Partner of the law firm of Miller Zeiderman & Wiederkehr, LLP, is both a matrimonial attorney, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and a Certified Financial Litigator. It was during her own divorce that Lisa’s path to a career in matrimonial law was forged. Lisa, a businesswoman in the fashion industry, was dismayed at being a bystander in court as complex issues relating to her finances were contested by a disorganized attorney. It was then she decided that she would go to law school herself and help clients navigate the stressful, and sometimes traumatic, process of divorce by becoming a responsive attorney who would protect her clients’ assets as though they were her own hard-earned dollars. Lisa can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org for more information about her firm’s services.
May 9, 2018
Amanda D. Singer, San Diego Family Mediation Center
Does the idea of a prenup worry you that you have set the scene for a divorce or raise trust issues? While many believe that signing a prenup predicts divorce, it is actually a great way to break money silence before you walk down the aisle. Listen in as Kathleen interviews Amanda about how to bust this myth wide open and start communicating about money before you say “I do.”
- All couples have a prenup even if you don’t craft one. States determine how assets will be split should a couple divorce. By drafting a prenup with your partner you are actually taking control and deciding for yourselves how you want your assets to be divided, if and when you do break up.
- Prenups are no longer just for the ultra-wealthy. Historically, prenuptial agreements were a way of affluent families protecting themselves from gold diggers. Today more millennials with dual careers and business start-ups, and people entering their second marriages are signing these documents.
- The prenup process opens up the lines of communication. If you identify your respective money mindsets, discuss similarities and differences in your family money messages, and agree how to financially operate as a couple, you actually are less likely to divorce. Yes, you sign a legal document but the experience is much richer than you might think.
Amanda Singer, Esq., MDR, CDFA is a professional family mediator and co-owner of San Diego Family Mediation Center. She is also a licensed attorney and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst. She works to help families improve communication, solve problems and reach agreements while staying out of court. Amanda is on the board of Academy of Professional Family Mediators and is the co-chair of this year's conference. She earned her JD from Chapman University School of Law while completing her Master's Degree in Dispute Resolution from The Straus at Pepperdine University School of Law. She earned her Bachelor's Degree in Sociology from Brandies University and has completed her courses as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst. San Diego Family Mediation Center works with families dealing with various family issues, including divorce mediation, premarital mediation, blended families and parenting plans.
For more information, visit www.SanDiegoFamilyMediation.com and check out the book, Prenups for Lovers
August 30, 2017
Julie Lawrence, CFP®, Lawrence Financial Planning, LLC
Myth: I don’t need to talk about finances before getting married.
Not talking about money is the number two reason couples divorce according to Marriage.com. But couples who discuss money matters regularly act as a team and report greater levels of satisfaction with their partners. In today’s episode, Kathleen and Julie Lawrence, CFP®, examine the myth that couples don’t need to talk about finances before getting married. Listen in and learn some tips for talking about money with your honey!
Key Take Aways:
- Julie shares how she facilitates the telling of each partner’s money biography (consisting of a list of open-ended questions) and how this strategy helps the couple she works with discover their respective money mindsets.
- Communicating honestly about your saving and spending behaviors can be challenging. But doing so can really help partners understand each other. You may not change your money behaviors, but together you can commit and work toward shared couple goals.
- Different strategies work for different money personalities. For example, if you are a spender, setting up an automatic savings withdrawal each month makes sense. If you don’t see the money, you won’t spend it!
Julie Lawrence, CFP® opened Lawrence Financial Planning in 2009. She has more than 28 years of experience in finance and management and holds a B.A. in Management from National Louis University.
Julie has been quoted in Financial Planning magazine, Investment News, NAPFA Advisor magazine, the Saint Petersburg Times, MSNMoney.com, the Chicago Tribune and FinancialPlanning.com. She serves as a mentor for new ACP financial planners and is an active member of NAPFA.
Julie has lived in Florida since 1977. She has three children. In her spare time she practices yoga, walks, and goes kayaking.
June 21, 2017
Dr. Dorian Mintzer, Revolution Retirement
As a child, Dori grew up recognizing different money mindsets by watching her parents’ financial habits. Couples may have a division of labor when it comes to finances; but, it is important they talk about them so they know what questions should be asked in times of crisis. Dori and Kathleen explore this myth and why it is important that couples need to talk about money and that is actually an act of love.
- Use “I” statements when talking about money
- Ask a third person (financial advisor, banker, estate attorney, relationship or money coach) to help facilitate these conversations
- Appreciate your partner in a money conversation (share what it was like growing up, was money talked about, what does money mean to you, etc.)
How do you honestly and openly talk about money as a couple? (Click to Tweet)
Dr. Dori Mintzer - With over 40 years of experience as a psychologist, Dr. Dorian Mintzer (Dori) is an experienced therapist, executive coach, consultant, speaker, and writer. She is the co-author of The Couples Retirement Puzzle: The 10 Must-Have Conversations for Creating an Amazing New Life Together, and co-producer of “The Career Playbook: Second Half Plays. Dori has been featured in a variety of media such as the NY Times, Wall Street Journal, NPR, ABC Evening News, and the Today Show. For more information visit www.revolutionizeretirement.com.
Virtual: The 4th Tuesday Revolutionize your Retirement Interview with Expert's Series is at 12:00 noon eastern time and open to professionals and the public. Sign-up begins the week before each call at www.revolutionizeretirement.com.
May 10, 2017
Kelly Shikany, CFP® CDFA™, Lakeside Wealth Management
In this episode, Kathleen talks to Kelly about the myth, “Planning is unnecessary because you only live once.” When people buy into this myth they often wait too long to seek the help of an advisor. Kelly busts this myth open and discusses the importance of financially planning for the future so you can enjoy today.
Listen and discover:
- How planning for the future now, gives you many more choices when it comes to how you want to live in retirement.
- Why working with an advisor can help you define your core values so you can build a retirement plan that honors these ideals.
- That you are never too young to plan for your future because you only live once!
Kelly Shikany, CFP® is a member of the Financial Planning Association serving clients at Lakeside Wealth Management in Chesterton, IN, and the surrounding communities. Kelly has 20 years of investment management experience, is a strong advocate for women investors who may be managing life’s milestones, and a supporter of gender equality since 7th grade. She volunteers on the CFP® Boards Pilot program, "Each One Reach Three,” mentors women financial advisors and hosts a quarterly gathering for them to enhance financial confidence and engagement. You can contact Kelly at email@example.com, or visit her website at http://www.lakesidewealth.com.
To sign up for the Breaking Money Silence Podcast, click here.
April 12, 2017
Julie Littlechild, Founder, Absolute Engagement
The idea that couples don’t need to be equally involved in managing money sounds contrary to popular financial planning mindsets. Kathleen and Julie discuss what happens when both individuals in a couple are not equally involved in finances, how to handle expectations, and improve effective communications around money. Listeners walk away with tips on how to reframe the money conversation, decide who is better equipped to take the lead on execution vs. vision for finances, and how advisors can help draw both individuals into the discussion.
Julie Littlechild is a speaker, writer, and researcher. Her firm, Absolute Engagement, conducts on-going research into the drivers of personal, client and team engagement.
Julie has worked with and studied top performing financial advisors, their clients and their teams for twenty years. She is a recognized expert on driving deeper engagement and growth, the author of a popular blog. Her book, The Pursuit of Absolute Engagement, was released in January 2107. For more information, contact Julie at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Special Announcement for Breaking Money Silence Podcast Listeners:
Julie's first book, 'The Pursuit of Absolute Engagement' was released in January 2017. More information is available at www.absoluteengagement.com/book where listeners can download the first chapter free.
August 10, 2016
Michelle McKinnon,Financial Advisor, Payne Capital Management
Michelle discusses how through her relationships with her clients she has discovered how many people buy into the myth that Social Security will provide for them in retirement. In this podcast, she warns listeners about how Social Security can lead you into a false sense of security and how important it is to be proactive about retirement savings. Listen in and learn how to start tracking your expenses and realistically planning for the future.
Michelle McKinnon is a financial advisor with Payne Capital Management (PCM) and hosts a weekly podcast called $martWomen. Michelle is committed to helping women manage their finances with ease. To learn more, visit her website at http://paynecm.com/ or listen to her podcast at $martWomen.
June 29, 2016
Rhonda Noordyk, Founder & CEO, The Women’s Financial Wellness Center, LLC
Rhonda Noordyk, Founder & CEO of The Women’s Financial Wellness Center, LLC and Certified Women’s Leadership Coach, joined Kathleen on this episode. Together they discussed the false belief that only those without money need financial literacy training. Rhonda shares her experience starting a for-profit center focused on educating and supporting women in transition such as death of a spouse or divorce. She provides tips on how to bust through this myth (Hint: Become aware, tolerate uncomfortable feelings and then decide what, if anything, to change.)
Rhonda ends the program with a special offer for Breaking Money Silence™ listeners: Mention you listened to this podcast and receive 10% off on the next New Beginnings™ facilitator training. This course is designed for financial advisors, insurance agents, attorneys, and therapists. To register, call 262.522.1502 or visit the website.
Rhonda Noordyk brings over a decade of financial industry and higher education experience to the marketplace. In 2014, she opened The Women’s Financial Wellness Center. Its mission is to alleviate the financial vulnerability of women in transition by providing a safe environment for them to acquire financial knowledge and learn practical tools. The center also offers access to a team of financial wellness experts and holistic collaborative partners. In addition, Rhonda developed and facilitates New Beginnings™ workshops to help women challenge money attitudes and guide them step-by-step through the change process, whether it be divorce or widowhood. Her work has been featured on Fox6 News, Studio A, and Morning Blend. For more information, click here.
April 20, 2016
Kathleen interviews Shell Tain, a certified money coach and friend, about one of her favorite money myths. Shell discusses how this unhealthy money script can give a person a false sense of control and get in the way of true intimacy between partners. By the end of their time together, they both agree a healthier belief is to allow others to “engage in money with me” and share this part of our lives.
Shell Tain is a credentialed certified coach, a money coach who knows how to help people make changes. As an Accountant/Controller for many years, Shell gained first hand money experience in everything from "start-ups" to mid-sized companies. She knows that improving the way you are with money isn’t just about number crunching. Shell, the Untangler, helps you find a way out of your money knot. For more information or to schedule a complimentary money coaching session,visit http://shelltain.com/ or call 503.258.1630.